Are women more likely to regret one-night stands? Only when they sleep with men

An international online survey found that women regret one-night stands more than men and that this difference is strongly associated with their ability to achieve an orgasm. Additionally, participants tended to report more regret when their levels of intoxication were higher. The paper was published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.

Casual sexual relationships and experiences, commonly known as hook-ups, are intimate relationships that involve sexual activity without a commitment to a long-term romantic partnership. These dynamics have most often been investigated among North American university students, who experience casual sex so frequently that such experiences are considered an essential part of college culture by some authors.

However, in recent decades, these sexual behaviors have become more common among the broader population thanks to online apps specifically designed for finding casual sex partners. In spite of this, social and cultural attitudes toward casual sex vary widely across societies.

People generally engage in casual sexual relationships for physical satisfaction, exploration, or companionship without expectations of exclusivity. Casual sexual experiences can include one-time encounters or ongoing arrangements.

Emotional outcomes can differ, with some individuals remaining detached while others develop feelings for their casual partners. But while many people enjoy these encounters, individuals often experience regret after engaging in casual sex. Historically, psychological research has shown that this regret is significantly more common among women.

Study authors Christina Sagioglou and Maximilian Dick conducted a study exploring the factors that could explain these gender differences. They were particularly interested in seeing how participants evaluated their most recent one-night stand—defined as a single sexual encounter between people who do not expect an ongoing romantic or sexual relationship afterward.

The study participants consisted of 1,075 individuals who reported having had at least one one-night stand in their life. The study authors recruited them by posting invites across various online forums looking for individuals with such experience. Of the participants, 651 were women, and the average age was 25 years. Regarding nationalities, 349 participants were German, 348 were Austrian, and the remaining participants were from the U.S., Italy, and Great Britain. The survey was available in German and English.

The survey asked participants to report how many one-night stands they had in total, the date of their latest one-night stand, their relationship status at the time, and the sexual activities they engaged in (given oral sex, received oral sex, vaginal sex, anal sex, or other). It also asked for details regarding the occurrence of the one-night stand (e.g., after a date, after a party, or a random encounter), the prior relationship with the partner (e.g., met that same day, dating partner, distant acquaintance, or ex-partner), and the partner’s gender.

Participants also reported whether they were under the influence of psychoactive substances at the time and how strong that influence was. They evaluated their experiences with their latest one-night stand, reporting sexual satisfaction, regret, worry about pregnancy, physical disgust toward the event, how much they felt pressured to engage in it, and any moral concerns they had. The last part of the survey contained a personality assessment (the Ten-Item Personality Inventory).

Results showed that almost 79% of women and 77% of men reported being single at the time of their last one-night stand. Just 6.2% of women and 12.4% of men were in a relationship, while 13.1% of women and 10.1% of men said that they had recently broken up.

Seventy-five percent of participants reported being under the influence of psychoactive substances when making the decision to engage in the one-night stand. For 99% of those participants, the substance was alcohol. However, 17% of participants reported that they had consumed cannabis, 3% reported consuming cocaine, 2% reported MDMA, and 1% consumed amphetamines.

More than half of the study participants reported that they had met their one-night stand partner on that same day, while 34% stated that they had known them for a while. Twenty percent of participants reported having 10 or more one-night stands in their lives.

Contrary to popular belief, most participants evaluated their one-night stands neutrally or positively, and levels of overall regret were generally low. Forty-seven percent of participants reported no regret at all.

However, as expected, women tended to report stronger regret than men—but only in heterosexual one-night stands.

There were no gender differences in regret when the one-night stand was with a same-sex partner. The researchers note that this finding challenges the evolutionary theory that women are biologically hardwired to regret casual sex; if that were true, women would regret the encounters regardless of who they slept with. Instead, the finding suggests that the higher regret experienced by women is driven by the specific dynamics of heterosexual interactions.

Further analyses found that the factor most strongly mediating the regret gap between heterosexual genders was sexual satisfaction. Specifically, the strongest driver of this gap was whether the participant achieved an orgasm during the sexual encounter. Because men in heterosexual encounters had much higher rates of orgasm and satisfaction, their regret was lower. Women in heterosexual encounters reported much lower rates of satisfaction and orgasm, leading to higher regret.

Other factors that contributed to higher regret for women in heterosexual encounters included feeling subtle pressure to engage in the sex (decision heteronomy), worrying about their reputation, and intoxication.

Interestingly, researchers found that alcohol had a “U-shaped” effect on regret. A little bit of alcohol didn’t cause much regret, but getting very drunk caused a massive spike in regret for both genders, likely because heavy drinking lowers sexual performance and decision-making ability.

“The results indicate that enhancing experiential quality through mutual satisfaction and autonomous decision-making offers the most promising path toward enhancing the positive outcomes of single sexual encounters,” the study authors concluded.

The study contributes to the scientific understanding of the psychological processes related to casual sexual encounters. However, the data used in the study were collected using retrospective self-reports, leaving room for reporting bias or memory degradation to have affected the results. Additionally, the cross-sectional design of the study does not allow any definitive causal inferences to be derived from the results.

The paper, “The Gender Gap in One‑Night Stand Regret: Evidence from Heterosexual and Same‑Sex Encounters,” was authored by Christina Sagioglou and Maximilian Dick.