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If you frequently type the words “I’m literally on my way,” and are quite literally not on your way, send this to your friend/partner/parent/loved one ahead of the holidays, your birthday, whenever! And welcome (I say this with deep, familial fondness) to the type B clan. It’s really fun here! Chaotic, sure, but fun. Of course, we shouldn’t view people in strict binaries, even when it comes to our approaches toward life, but I think it’s fair to say some of us are a little less organized than others. Some of us don’t understand that 15 minutes to be out the door means 15 minutes, and some of us will forget where we put that lovely bottle of perfume we splurged on unless it has a very specific place it goes. And hey, that’s okay! It happens! But I’ve compiled a list of items to make life easier for you, my type B friend, or for the loved one who regularly deals with a type B friend, categorized into sections anticipating the ways in which you might get in your own way. Here’s to less bickering and more fun this holiday season. Cheers!
Girl, Go to Bed
Doing the good ol’ bedtime revenge thing again, are we? Where you scroll endlessly, or perhaps slither down a Google wormhole (“How tall is Dev Patel? Dev Patel single? Dev Patel current partner? Dev Patel near me”) in hopes of regaining some “you” time at the end of the day? Put the phone down. You know what’s better revenge? A good night’s rest!
Oura Ring Gen3 Horizon
Type Bs need something that will shame them into sleeping, and an Oura ring will do just that by presenting each person with a “sleep score” based on how much rest they got the night before.
Moon Juice Magnesi-Om
This will put them to bed gently …
Rose Los Angeles Deep Sleep
… and this will put them to bed gently, and then very firmly, but in the best way. My best night of sleep ever was with these gummies.
Morgenthal Frederics Hara
We’re looking at screens likely at every minute of every day. Blue-light glasses seriously help with eye fatigue and helping you get to bed when you know darn well you’re not supposed to be looking at your phone an hour before bed (and still doing it anyway).
Warby Parker Esme
Begone, tired eyes!
Forgot to Pick Out an Outfit, Didn’t You?
They won’t look for an outfit for that one thing until it’s too late …
Rue Sophie Valette Mockneck Dress
… to remediate that, they’ll need an LBD that’s versatile and easy to dress up or down.
Rent The Runway Gift Card
For the last-minute wedding/holiday/might-be-getting-engaged-this-weekend dress.
Zebzag Suede Slingback Platform Mule
Year-round mules. Day-long comfort. We’ve turned up the warm on our Zebzag mule with a Borg fleece warm lining, rebuilt in rugged black Bronx suede with contrasting fleece linings. Fitted with an adjustable strap with snap fastenings, the sole is marked with signature grooving and yellow welt stitching above the utilitarian tread.
World Off, Brain ON
Our brains are loud and busy enough as is!
Bose QuietComfort Headphones
This diva cannot concentrate to save her life, especially when she’s overstimulated. Get her some noise-canceling headphones. Trust me.
Bowers & Wilkins Px8
A group of high-schoolers told me they thought my headphones were cool when I was wearing these. I haven’t been the same since.
A (City-Pilled) Getaway Car
Your friend has poor time management. Even before the event invite was sent out, she was running late. The subway is fast, sure, but it’s likely delayed, and if they have to make a transfer, it’s over. I’ve saved my own ass multiple times by zooming (safely!) on an electric Citi Bike or my own little tiny Brompton bike (it literally just folds up and you can tuck it anywhere) to whatever event and making it just in the nick of time.
Brompton C Line Urban – 2 Speed
For city zipping.
Citi Bike Membership
For zipping on a Citi.
No, I’m Literally on My Way
Your friend did not manage their time properly. They’ve jumped out of the shower, their hair is wet, and they’re supposed to be at the event in 45 minutes …
Dyson Airstrait
… enter the Dyson Airstrait. I’d recommend this only for 3b curl patterns and below, but it took me 20 minutes flat to get my long (below my waist) curly hair suitably straight. For reference, it usually will take me an hour to do my hair alone.
Okay, I’m Actually on My Way
You’re lying if you said you’ve never done your makeup in the car. And if you haven’t, I don’t trust you. Below are my tried-and-true products you can apply easily, and safely, in the car on the way to the event. Together, these can give the illusion of a seriously put-together look, even if your life is not at all.
NARS Radiant Creamy Concealer with Medium Coverage
For when they forgot to wear their blue-light glasses.
NARS Afterglow Liquid Blush
Light, buildable, and nearly foolproof.
Charlotte Tilbury Lip Cheat Lip Liner
Easily blendable in case you happen to color outside the lines a bit too generously.
Dior Addict Lip Glow Balm
Soft, smooth, and buttery.
A Door Perfume
Allow me to introduce you to this novel concept I’ve concocted. As a type B, if I can’t see it, either on my face or in front of me, I will forget about it. Unless it brings together my skin-care or makeup look, it will slip my mind, and unfortunately, that means perfume is the first casualty. I love to have a scrumptious signature scent, but as mere mortals, we can’t see smell, and therefore, I’ll have just left my home, too far away (and likely running too late) to turn back to apply perfume. As a result, I’ve started keeping a bottle of perfume right at the door, so I can make eyes with her, and therefore not forget, to put it on.
Fine’ry Not Another Cherry Body Mist Fragrance Spray
This makes a fabulous stocking stuffer and comes highly recommended by our beauty editor, Asia Milia Ware.
Noyz Unmute Eau De Parfum
Another highly recommended scent from our beauty team.
Perfumehead Moon Flower
One of my favorite all-time scents that presents both sweet and warm and lasts all night.
Trudon Absolu
A delicious, fruity, and balanced citrus blend with cedar base notes.
Diptyque Eau Delle Eau de Toilette
For those who still love to smell like vanilla (me), but refined.
Last, But Not Least
You can take a horse to water, but can’t teach it to drink. Or however the saying goes. You can attempt to give your type B friend a planner, but you can’t force them to use it.
Leuchtturm1917 Weekly Planner and Notebook 2025
This planner comes highly recommended by several creative, scatterbrain types I trust. One side is the week’s dates, and the other is a simple lined piece of paper, perfect for all the overflow thoughts going through your frazzled friend’s head
