Martha Stewart Does Not Want to Be Touched

Photo: Dave Kotinsky/Getty Images for Financo

Martha Stewart is notoriously icy. She’s the walking poster child for stoicism, a shrewd entrepreneur whose close friend once described her as “always a little bit chilly, not good at expressing emotions” in Netflix’s recent documentary about her. Stewart has certainly loosened up as an octogenarian, posing for Sports Illustrated in a bikini and fashioning herself the undisputed queen of the mirror selfie. Still, I wouldn’t necessarily peg her as the type who is down for hugs, giggles, and gabbing. Drew Barrymore, apparently, disagrees.

On Tuesday, Stewart appeared on The Drew Barrymore Show to discuss her 100th book as well as R.J. Cutler’s documentary about her life. While trying to get Stewart to open up about what she looks for in a romantic partner, Barrymore asked if there’s anything that makes her feel “soft and gooey.” Stewart paused. “Soft and gooey treatment … it’s nice,” the 83-year-old replied, as Barrymore began touching her back. She continued to stroke her guest, until Stewart told her she was “the wrong gender” and jokingly pushed her away. Barrymore seemed to take the shove in good stride, and both women laughed off the moment.

Much of The Drew Barrymore Show’s appeal lies in its casual intimacy, but that doesn’t mean the host’s touchy approach always lands. Might I remind you of the time she held hands with Vice-President Kamala Harris and told her the country really needed a “Momala”? Or when she repeatedly stroked Oprah Winfrey’s arm mid-interview? Sounds like a pattern to me. In August, she told Entertainment Tonight that, moving forward, she’d try to “practice physical distance, which is not my strong point.” A for effort, Drew.

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