A new study suggests that people in consensually nonmonogamous relationships tend to experience higher-quality sexual communication compared to those in monogamous relationships. Despite this difference, both groups showed similar levels of sexual satisfaction, relationship satisfaction, and communication self-confidence.
How couples talk about sex plays a key role in how satisfied they feel with their relationships. But when researchers have explored this topic, they’ve typically focused on monogamous couples. A new study published in the Journal of Family Psychology aims to broaden that lens by examining how people in consensually nonmonogamous relationships compare to those in monogamous ones when it comes to sexual communication and related outcomes. The researchers found that people in nonmonogamous relationships tended to report more positive experiences discussing sex with their partners, but the overall levels of sexual and relationship satisfaction were similar between both groups.
The study was conducted by Emily S. Bibby and Joanne Davila from Stony Brook University. The researchers wanted to better understand whether people in nonmonogamous relationships—such as those who identify as polyamorous, open, or practicing relationship anarchy—differ from monogamous couples in how they talk about sex.
Past research has linked strong sexual communication to better sexual and relationship outcomes. However, little research has directly compared these dynamics across different types of relationship structures, even as nonmonogamy becomes more visible and accepted in mainstream culture. Bibby and Davila designed the study to address this gap and to explore whether relationship structure influences communication quality and sexual satisfaction.
To carry out the study, the researchers recruited 576 young adults between the ages of 18 and 35 who were in at least one committed romantic relationship. Participants were recruited through both online platforms and a university campus. They completed a series of surveys about their relationship status, sexual practices, and communication habits. Participants in nonmonogamous relationships were asked to focus on one specific partner to make their responses comparable to those in monogamous relationships.
The surveys included measures of sexual communication quality, which assessed how open and satisfying their conversations about sex were. Another set of measures looked at sexual communication self-efficacy, or how confident people felt about expressing both positive and negative thoughts about sex. Participants also reported on their sexual satisfaction, how happy they were with their sexual communication, how satisfied they were with their relationship overall, and how often they had sex with their selected partner.
When comparing the two groups, one key difference stood out. People in consensually nonmonogamous relationships reported significantly higher levels of sexual communication quality. They were more likely to agree with statements like “talking about sex is a satisfying experience for both of us,” suggesting a more open and collaborative atmosphere around sexual discussions. This difference remained even after controlling for other factors like gender identity, sexual orientation, and how long participants had been in their relationship.
In contrast, there were no significant differences between groups when it came to self-efficacy. Both monogamous and nonmonogamous participants reported similar levels of confidence in their ability to communicate about sex. This held true for both positive topics, like suggesting a new sexual activity, and negative ones, such as expressing discomfort or dissatisfaction. The authors note that while people in nonmonogamous relationships may be more practiced at discussing relationship logistics and boundaries, this does not necessarily translate into greater self-assuredness in every aspect of sexual communication.
Another important finding was that there were no statistically significant differences between the two groups in terms of how satisfied they were with their sex lives, how satisfied they were with sexual communication, or how happy they were in their relationships. The frequency of sexual activity also did not differ between groups. This challenges a common assumption that open relationships are either inherently more or less satisfying than monogamous ones. It also echoes prior research showing mixed results on whether polyamorous or open couples report better outcomes than monogamous ones.
Despite some of these null findings, the study confirmed a pattern that has been seen across past research: better sexual communication is linked to better outcomes. Participants who reported higher communication quality also reported greater sexual satisfaction, more happiness with sexual communication, and higher overall relationship satisfaction. This was true regardless of whether they were in a monogamous or nonmonogamous relationship.
People who felt more confident in their ability to communicate both positive and negative sexual messages also tended to be more satisfied in these areas, although there were some exceptions. For example, confidence in discussing negative sexual topics was not strongly linked to how often couples had sex.
Interestingly, the researchers found no evidence that relationship structure changed the strength of these associations. In other words, the benefits of sexual communication were similar for everyone, whether they were in a monogamous or nonmonogamous relationship. This suggests that the tools for building a healthy sexual relationship—such as being open, honest, and communicative—may be useful regardless of the relationship model a person chooses.
The study does have limitations. For example, participants in nonmonogamous relationships were only asked to report on one of their partners, which may not reflect their broader communication patterns across multiple relationships. Some aspects of sexual communication that may be especially relevant in nonmonogamous relationships—like negotiating safer sex with multiple partners—were not directly measured. Also, because the study focused only on people in committed relationships, the findings may not apply to people who are casually dating or in newer relationships.
Another limitation relates to the demographics of the sample. While the study included a large number of gender-diverse and queer participants, it was predominantly White. This may affect how broadly the findings can be applied to more racially or culturally diverse populations. The researchers also note that their sample consisted of relatively young adults, which may influence the results. People in different life stages may have different communication patterns or relationship needs.
The study’s design was cross-sectional, meaning all data were collected at one time point. This limits the ability to draw conclusions about how communication and satisfaction influence each other over time. Future research might benefit from tracking these dynamics longitudinally or examining daily patterns using diary methods to reduce recall bias. More comprehensive measures of sexual communication that capture the full range of discussions in both monogamous and nonmonogamous relationships could also deepen our understanding of these processes.
Overall, the study adds to a growing body of evidence that open communication about sex is linked to greater satisfaction in relationships. It also challenges the assumption that monogamous and nonmonogamous relationships function in fundamentally different ways when it comes to communication and satisfaction.
The findings may have practical implications for therapists, counselors, and educators working with individuals and couples across a range of relationship structures. Rather than focusing narrowly on whether a relationship is monogamous or not, the researchers said, professionals may want to emphasize developing communication skills and self-confidence when talking about sexual needs and preferences.
The study, “Sexual Communication and Satisfaction in Young Adults’ Monogamous and Consensually Nonmonogamous Relationships,” was authored by Emily S. Bibby and Joanne Davila.
