Sexual humor boosts intimacy and uniquely enhances sexual satisfaction, study suggests

Sexual humor appears to positively influence sexual satisfaction in romantic relationships, as reported in The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality.

Christine D. Lomore and colleagues examined the role of sexual humor in romantic relationships, an area often overshadowed by general relational humor in the literature.

Past research has demonstrated the critical role of humor in relationships. Humor can help reduce tension and fosters closeness in various relational contexts. For example, relational humor styles (whether positive, instrumental, or negative) significantly correlate with relationship satisfaction. However, sexual humor, uniquely characterized by its sensitivity and intimacy, is relatively under-researched, prompting this study’s focus on its forms, frequency, and outcomes.

This study involved 196 participants who were at least 18 years old and in romantic relationships lasting a minimum of four months. Participants were recruited through university psychology courses and online platforms. The final sample was predominantly female (84.7%), with an average age of 20.3 years, and included individuals identifying as heterosexual (74.5%) and LGBTQ+ (21.8%). Participants reported an average relationship length of 25 months, with a mix of relationship types, including exclusive dating, long-distance, and cohabitating partnerships.

The study utilized various measures to assess relationship and sexual satisfaction and sexual humor use. The Relationship Assessment Scale (RAS) measured general relationship satisfaction, while the New Sexual Satisfaction Scale (NSSS) evaluated satisfaction with sexual experiences. To understand humor, researchers employed the Relational Humor Inventory (RHI), which captures different humor styles, such as positive, negative, and instrumental.

In addition, participants completed a custom survey to detail their experiences with sexual humor, including describing specific examples, their perceptions of its frequency and emotional valence, and its impact on their relationship. Open-ended responses were reviewed and coded by researchers to identify common themes, with a focus on humor’s situational use and its emotional consequences.

The researchers found that sexual humor was a common element in participants’ romantic relationships, generally associated with positive outcomes. Most participants reported feeling closer, more accepted, and more comfortable with their partners when sexual humor was used. For example, humor often served to smooth over awkward or embarrassing moments, such as mishaps during sexual activity, which helped reduce discomfort and strengthen intimacy. Participants also highlighted that humor added lightness and playfulness to their interactions, contributing to an enjoyable and relaxed atmosphere.

The study identified distinct types of sexual humor, including inside jokes and couple rituals, physical humor, wordplay, and humor used during sexual initiation or to suggest new activities. Importantly, participants who reported more frequent and positively valenced sexual humor also reported higher levels of sexual and relationship satisfaction.

While sexual humor frequency alone did not significantly predict satisfaction, its valence—whether it was perceived as positive—played a crucial role. Instances of negative valence, while infrequent, were linked to discomfort and dissatisfaction. A small number of participants reported that negative sexual humor felt offensive, killed the mood, or made them feel insecure.

Positive relational humor strongly predicted the frequency and valence of sexual humor, underscoring the interconnectedness of general and sexual humor styles.

Of note is that the study’s sample was predominantly young, female, and heterosexual, limiting the generalizability of findings.

The study, “The use of sexual humor in romantic relationships: Description, valence, and association with sexual satisfaction,” was authored by Christine D. Lomore, Angela D. Weaver, and Claire E. Lavoie.

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